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Now displaying: May, 2021
May 24, 2021

In this episode, TEDx Speaker, Mentor, and Certified Feng Shui Practitioner, Kate MacKinnon, talks about getting on to TEDx stages.

Today, Kate talks about overcoming roadblocks in the application process, how to prepare your presentation for the event, and how she decided on the topic of her TEDx talk. What does it feel like to share an idea worth spreading?

Hear about her own experience getting on to the TEDx stage, being mistaken for Kate McKinnon, and get Kate’s advice to her younger self, all on today’s episode of The Healthy, Wealthy & Smart Podcast.

 

Key Takeaways

  • “It’s not an outside thing. It’s an inside thing.”
  • “We’re in a society that values youth, youthful looks, the up-and-comers, etc.”
  • “Age is just a number. But I know so many women feel like they’re not heard, especially if they’re over a certain age.”
  • “We get better as we age. That’s the thing that we really need to get.”
  • “There are a lot of TEDx talks out there. You want to vet them. You want to find out about who’s producing them.”
  • “Don’t bother the TEDx producers. They’re not the ones to ask these questions of.”
  • “Reach out to past TEDx speakers.”
  • “Ultimately, you dont want to just be practicing in front of your cat. You’re going to want to practice in front of other people.”
  • “Don’t get too overwhelmed by it. You can learn.”
  • “If you want to get better at tennis, you hire a tennis coach. If you want to get better at speaking, you hire a coach that can teach you how to be a good public speaker.”
  • “If there’s one person out there that I can touch and make a difference, there’s that ripple effect.”
  • “You have everything you need to be successful right now. The only difference between me and you is experience.”

 

More about Kate MacKinnon

Kate MacKinnon, Feng Shui Expert, TEDx Speaker, and Mentor, is a Certified Feng Shui Practitioner, consulting for businesses and individuals for over 20 years, both locally and globally. Before becoming a Feng Shui Expert, Kate had a management technology consulting company and was Vice President for JPMorgan Chase & Co.

She taught the first online Feng Shui course for the Institute for Integrative Nutrition and a workshop for the Hospital for Special Surgery and Global Real Estate Women’s Group at JPMorgan Chase. Kate has also written articles on Feng Shui and been a guest and interviewed by thought leaders on Speaking, Life Transitions, and Women Empowerment.

Kate’s mission is to use Feng Shui’s power to illuminate and inspire women to step into their power and greatness and live a life of Beauty, Grace, Dignity, and Abundance, and make a difference in the world. You can find her inspiring talk on Women, Aging, and Visibility on TED.com.

 

Kate’s TED Talk: Women, Aging, and Visibility

NetHealth Digital Marketing Solutions

 

Suggested Keywords

TEDx, TED Talk, Speaking, Public Speaking, Feng Shui, Women, Age, Aging, Visibility, Talking, Influence, Learning, Healthy, Wealthy, Smart, Inspiration, Motivation,

 

To learn more, follow Kate at:

Website:          https://kate-mackinnon.com

Facebook:       Kate MacKinnon

Instagram:       @fengshuikate

Twitter:            @fengshuikate

LinkedIn:         Kate MacKinnon

 

Subscribe to Healthy, Wealthy & Smart:

Website: https://podcast.healthywealthysmart.com

Apple Podcasts:          https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/healthy-wealthy-smart/id532717264

Spotify:                        https://open.spotify.com/show/6ELmKwE4mSZXBB8TiQvp73

SoundCloud: https://soundcloud.com/healthywealthysmart

Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/show/healthy-wealthy-smart

iHeart Radio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/263-healthy-wealthy-smart-27628927

 

Read the Full transcript here: 

Speaker 1 (00:01):

Hi, Kate, welcome to the podcast. I am happy to have you on. Thank you,

Speaker 2 (00:07):

Karen. I'm so excited to be on with you.

Speaker 1 (00:09):

And just so the listeners know, as you probably heard in the intro said, my guest today is Kate McKinnon, which it is. And so how often are you getting mistaken for the famous comedian, Kate McKinnon also in the New York area?

Speaker 2 (00:26):

No, all the time. I just a quick funny story, because the first time it happened to me when she was just becoming popular was I made a dinner reservation at the Odeon. And when I showed up, somebody said, are you Kate McKinnon? And I said, yes, the star, Kate McKinnon. I said, yes. And then he realized I was not her. And I said, well, I am, am I

Speaker 1 (00:49):

That's great.

Speaker 2 (00:50):

It's funny. And then my husband said, I'm going to start making dinner reservations,

Speaker 1 (00:55):

But that, but the thing is, she actually

Speaker 2 (00:56):

Spells her name. M C K I N N O N. And I spelled M a C K I N. So she's ruined the spelling, my name, but that's okay. I'm delighted to be the Kate McKinnon not the comedian.

Speaker 1 (01:09):

Absolutely. And, and, you know, you can probably get a table anywhere. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, absolutely. And when you show up, you're not lying. I think it's great. And now, but you are a star because you were on the TEDx stage and this month we are talking all about Ted X talks and how to get onto that stage. So, like I said, in the, in your bio that you were on TEDx Farmingdale stage in 2020. So talk about your experience. What was it like?

Speaker 2 (01:44):

My God, can I tell you a little history to it? I mean, it's, it's an amazing experience. It really is because I I've been wanting to do TEDx for a while, but to be honest, who I was not born a speaker and we met, we actually met with Tricia, Brooke at her speaker salon in 2018, the spring, I think it was 2018. And that was the first time I'd ever spoken on a stage in my life. And honestly, it was one of the most terrifying things I've ever done. I thought it was going to die. And it was the first time I'd done a talk that was even remotely like a TEDx. And what I did love was the power of being able to get up and be an authentic speaker and have a message that resonated for people on. And I just want to share that quick story because I S I talked about my two greatest losses being my two greatest gifts, and I lost my, I lost my hearing in my left ear at one and a half for meningitis.

Speaker 2 (02:39):

And then I lost my mother at four, and I talk about that and I couldn't even put it on line for a long time, but I finally did. I went to Spain. I was in a, at a Tapper's party in the mountains of Spain, and somebody came up to me and they said, I heard your talk. I'm deaf too. And they wanted to talk to me about it. And what I learned then was it doesn't really matter. You could speak to a hundred, you could speak to a million people, but we're really, we're really trying to get to that person that, that touches. And if it's only one we've made a difference in somebody's life. And so that just gave me the bug. And so I then did Trisha did another speaker salon in the spring of 2019, and then it wasn't. And so I did another talk.

Speaker 2 (03:25):

And then finally the third talk in the fall of 2019, I I was going to do at the speaker salon to talk about my business functions way, but Trisha had this masterclass on doing a TEDx talk. So I took it, and it was during that, where we went through the process of how do you actually create an application? So it starts with the whole process of, of an idea worth spreading. It's not like having an issue or a problem. It's like, you're creating an idea that's worth spreading. And, you know, we go through a whole exercise and she gives us questions that we answered to just kind of dig deeper to those things that are important to us, that we feel like we want to talk about. And in the process of going through the class we I dunno at one point I somehow got talking about women and how mentoring women and the importance of me, of women.

Speaker 2 (04:18):

And, you know, there were, there was sort of this topic around there. And somehow it got shaped where it was about me turning, you know, at that point it was, I was 62, I think, 62 or 63. And somehow it got shaped around what it means to be a woman aging in this society. Oh, and I know that was really the key. We were doing it with a TEDx in mind. So there was a TEDx on women. And so the topic became of that. I'm sorry. That's right. That's like talking about that and sort of digging deeper into that. And that just really resonated. And so there's that the idea where it's spreading, which ended up being for me that society deems women invisible after a certain age, and this is something we can change now and forever. So our younger sisters never feel they're like go out, which still makes good silica gives me chills.

Speaker 2 (05:12):

I mean, it just really still came so deep from with me. And then the next question is when you're doing the application, why are you the person to give this talk? And I was like, I don't know. And Trisha was really funny. She goes, can I answer that question for the church? He goes, because you've been doing this your entire life. So that, that it wasn't just like an intellectual thing. It was a thing that had been important to me for a long time, but I didn't really know it, but once these ideas come up and they come out, they sort of take on a life of their own. They really do. And so in that, that speaker salon, I had a chance to actually work on my talk in a workshop environment. So as you know, with the speaker salon, we have other speakers.

Speaker 2 (05:57):

So you get up on stage and you get to practice and get to write you get feedback and stuff like that. And it just, I could see from my fellow speakers that it was really resonating with them. So that was really powerful. Like I felt like there's something here that I really have to talk about. And so that idea then grew and grew and grew. And actually I had an opportunity to present it that, for that particular TEDx women's talk and I went there and the environment wasn't there, wasn't right. For me, I felt totally out of alignment. I didn't get support. It was like, I'd been with Trisha. We were so well taken care of. And, you know, you just show up, dressed up, made up, get on stage, you tech is taken care of. And it just wasn't that kind of event.

Speaker 2 (06:43):

And I felt like my talk deserved an event to really showcase it. So I actually had the talk a year before. So in December of 2019, it was ready to go. And that was really hard to walk away from. But by the time I did it for TEDx farming tale, it was just, it was in me, it was part of me. I probably can still do it with a little practice. It just came from me. So to me, that's a really powerful thing to say about doing TEDx talks. It's, it's an idea, but it's like, you end up, it's like, it comes out of you, you speak it. And then as you're speaking, you learn to embody it. Like, it's, it's a really interesting, like you talk it, but then it becomes part of you. So when you're actually presenting it for me, it was a full body experience.

Speaker 2 (07:30):

That's amazing. It just felt like it came from me. Yeah. Yeah. And it's so good. And, and don't worry everyone. We've got the link to it in the, in the show notes here. So you'll be able to watch her talk. But I love, I just want to circle back to something that you said when you were filling up the application, why should you be the one to do this? And you said, I don't know, had Trisha take that one. She does not like the, I don't know. She does it well that well, and that's, what's so funny because she goes, she goes, well, I do. And so she knows me. She knows me well enough to say that, but it was, it was funny. She was like right on it. She was right on it. And and I think a lot of people might hit that, that roadblock in the application process. I don't know why should I do this? Like, you know, those, that imposter syndrome creeps in and why shouldn't you be the person to give this talk? That's a really hard question to answer. So what advice do you have for people if they're filling out an application and they get stuck, they hit a roadblock.

Speaker 3 (08:39):

Yeah.

Speaker 2 (08:41):

Yeah. You know, I I'll tell you something. I I'm an, a big believer I get, I always get help. I, you know, I have a community of people that I can ask things and run things by. And I think it's really important for something like this, because you want to get a sense that does it land, does it resonate or like people even knowing what you're talking about? Do you know what I mean? I just, that, that has been my experience that I think it's really been important for me to be able to run it past people. And, and in this case because I was in that masterclass setting, the other thing I was going to say was really, there was an interesting part of that because as I was working on the idea and that's part of it, it's like, sort of, it's like, we're responding, but we're working on the idea that somebody said to me, I got up and I don't quite remember how I said it, but at one point, one of the women said to me somewhere we both know, she said to me, why would I like, you know, cause I looked pretty good for my age.

Speaker 2 (09:41):

Right? Like I'll say, yeah, I look. And so a lot of people don't realize how old I am and it's just, it just sort of, you know, I always say to my father, he looked, he looked young until he turned 70. So I have a few more years. And so she said, why would women, why would women believe or trust you if they, you look like you do? And I said, but it's not an outside thing. It's an inside thing. But that question was so important, right. To get that kind of response. And I think, you know, that's, the other thing is like, you know, for me, you know, of course since I've done it, but like even doing it where it resonates for men, like there was something about it. It was, it was more than just being a woman, even though the conversation was about being a woman.

Speaker 2 (10:23):

And I got that from testing it out. Right. And talking about it as I was writing it that it needed to resonate beyond like, yeah, why would I listen to her? Cause she looks great. What does she really know about? So my story tells how I know deeply about what that experience is. And I think that's that, that one question stayed with me the whole time. It's like, it's gotta be beyond like, just looking at me and saying, Oh yeah, like, you know cause that's not really what it's about our inside light. And it's interesting since I've done the talk and lots of people have talked me about it. Men, women, men have talked about how it's affected them. Men have talked to me about how they want their wives to listen and, you know, gay men have talked to me. I mean, like it's really kind of across the board.

Speaker 2 (11:13):

But there was Oh one woman. I was somewhere and she came up to me and she was you know, like a 32 year old Afro-American woman. And she goes, identify. She goes, I've been feeling that she said, not only because you know of my race, but also because as a woman that I feel like I don't get taken seriously and I'm invisible. And I thought, wow. And I said to her, this is why I'm doing the talk because I like it so that you, you women, your age never had this experience ever. And you know, we're in a society that values youth that values youthful looks that values, you know, the

Speaker 1 (11:54):

Up and comers, the Anji news, the et cetera, et cetera. Right. And so, you know, when you, it's, it's surprising to hear someone in their thirties say that, but I, I mean, I'm in my forties and I know I feel that way. Yeah. You know, and, and that's why listening to your talk is actually quite healing because you're like, Oh, well, wait a second. I'm not the only person that feels this way or wait a second. It doesn't, that doesn't matter. It matters. What would I, like you said, the light that I have on the inside and how is that B how am I sharing that is kind of like what I got out of it. So I found it to be like, really affirming that like, Hey, and I know this is so cliche age is just a number. But it is, but I get, I know so many women feel that way. So many women feel like they're not heard especially if they're over a certain age, they're passed over if they're over a certain age. And so I think that's why the talk resonates so much.

Speaker 2 (13:05):

Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's, it's also interesting, you know, it's like the, you know what they say, like, you know, you see your, you see a yellow VW car, you know, Volkswagen car, and then, then you only see them, right? Like, it's like once I started writing about this talk and then reading books and it just happened, right. Like it seemed, but it was very synchronistic. How many in the books, like women over 50 writing stories about when they turn 50, when you know people in you know, broadcasting, people consulting people, you know, high-level executive women. It was really it. I suddenly saw it everywhere. I said, wow, I didn't even realize that this is just in the water of the conversation. Like we don't even know it's existing. So when I started talking about it, it's been out there, but I think people heard it in a new way.

Speaker 2 (14:00):

And my conversation, I actually just had this happen the other day, a woman I haven't and a beautiful, beautiful young woman who I haven't seen for years. I met her at a workshop up in Syracuse. I met her mom and she's been, you know, we've been sort of tracking each other on social media all these years. And then she reached out to me because she wanted to do an interview on funkshway. And she told me, she'd heard my talk. And she said, and she started quoting it. But the thing that she said that really struck me is what I had said, but she really mirrored back was that we get better as we age. That's the thing. And that's the thing that we really need to get. And so my talk is looking at the hero, not looking at the women behind me, but looking at the women who are out there, I start with an Amash, if you will, to, you know, by time I did it.

Speaker 2 (14:52):

And, and Farmingdale, Ruth, Ruth Bader Ginsburg was the first woman. I mentioned queen Elizabeth, Jane Fonda, Lily, Tommy, Tommy, like they're in their eighties and nineties and they are living full out lives. That's the message. We, we don't need to stop at our fifties. And if we're turning our light on and we're excited about what we're doing and we're out there, you know we were alive and that is what people see. That's the beauty. I mean, to me, that's really the beauty. It's like, we're living, we're living our life. And I, you know, I talk about Jane Fonda. She had a movie you know, five at Jane Fonda in five acts.

Speaker 1 (15:33):

Like she's still out there. Like she continues.

Speaker 2 (15:36):

I used to be out there. And she's now, you know, climate change and, you know, getting arrested for protesting and stuff like that. I love her. I love her. Right. That's, that's what I want. That's where I want to be looking. That's what I want to be looking at. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (15:52):

And it reminds me too, of like Joan Rivers, who was at her prime when she was 81, she had four TV shows a best-selling line on QVC all over the place. I mean, this is a woman who didn't stop, talk about always looking forward. Right, right. Definitely one of those women. So obviously your TEDx talk was a talk and an idea worth spreading touch people's lives a hundred percent. What do you have any other tricks or tips for the listeners about applying for your talk? And then, so you gave one have people around you to bounce ideas off of, I want to circle back because I want to know if you have any others and then we'll talk about the prep, the preparation. So any other tips or tricks? I, I,

Speaker 2 (16:48):

I would say so. I, I honestly I'm not here to promote anybody, but I would say it helped to have a coach. It really helped to have somebody knowledgeable because I'll tell you what I did learn from her is you kind of, you want to vet, there are a lot of TEDx talks out there and you want to vet them. You want to find one that is going to be, you know, preferably find out about who's producing it cause they're independent and they have guidelines and they should be following them. But sometimes a first time producer may or may not be prepared, right. Fully prepare to really give the, the, the kind of support you need. And that was my experience. It was just, I was, I was spoiled by the kind of sport I've been getting, but I saw that I needed to not worry about anything other than getting myself on stage and speaking and letting everything else be taken care of.

Speaker 2 (17:42):

So you want to vet and and that's, again, through a coach, I have somebody who who's experienced, she's placed other TEDx she's up place, but helped other people get on the TEDx stage. So that, that, that certainly for me was true. And you know, now it really getting out and you can, I, now we have club, you know, clubhouse people, you know, clubhouse event with people talking about TEDx and, you know, being able to do that 90 minute pitch and stuff like that. And people talking about is this topic. And, you know, for me, it was gathering information about it sort of understanding really what it was, watching them, watching them learning, you know, seeing what worked, what didn't work. And you know, certainly that's a big part of it. And if you know people, I had somebody reach out to me on LinkedIn cause she was going to do TEDx.

Speaker 2 (18:34):

So she wants to just talk to me to find out more about it. I think it's, it's one of those things where you, there are ways you can find people to find out. One of the things that, you know, Trisha will recommend, like don't bother the TEDx producers, right. If you're like an apply, you're going to apply, they're not the ones to ask these questions. They're really not. They're like, so you need to find that information elsewhere, but there's enough. There's like, Oh, and then that's it. Chris Anderson who started ted.com, it's also, he has a good book out on that. There's a number of books on it. I mean, it really kind of guides to help you think the process through, think about what you're really talking about. What's the difference between a TEDx talk and doing a key note for instance, or, you know, a lot of people. Yeah. I, I did you know, I worked in corporate America for a long time and I did a lot of debt, you know PowerPoint presentations, it's not the same, right. Like really kind of begin to understand really what it is that distinguishes it from other kinds of talks. So those are some of my thoughts just off the top of my head. That's amazing. I love, I would never thought

Speaker 1 (19:44):

Reach out to pass TEDx speakers. That's such a great tip. Such a great tip. All right. So let's talk about preparing for at the talk. So you just don't say, Oh, practice it a couple of times and wallah I'm up on stage. So talk about your preparation. Yes.

Speaker 2 (20:04):

So when I, and I, and again, I had a little bit of a jumpstart because I was in and working on another talk and then I ended up practicing my talk and the speaker salon. But

Speaker 1 (20:17):

It it's it takes

Speaker 2 (20:19):

Time. I, you know, I think there maybe some, somebody who's a better speaker than I am, but like if you were to apply and it was three weeks from now, and by the way, P TEDx neuro doesn't work that way apply. And then it's several months out, but you really need time to write the talk if you haven't written it to practice it memorization as a whole process, by the way, this is one of the things about getting older. I was afraid I was not going to be able to memorize a talk longer than three minutes. And my talk was I think, nine minutes and I've done 18 minutes, but learning the technique of memorization because they are a memorized talk and, and you don't necessarily have a teleprompter as a whole process of like, how do you memorize? So you've written the talk now you Steve to memorize it.

Speaker 2 (21:09):

And so that's a really important part. And part of the memorization, again, I've, I've had a lot of coaching from Tricia where you know, ways of memorizing, how to break the script down, sort of, you know, learning a little bit at a time, learning a little bit of time and then starting to put it all together. But part of that practicing is, you know, for me practicing at least three times a day, at least three times a day. And ultimately you don't want to just be practicing in front of your cat. You're going to want to practice in front of other people. But part of that practice was I'd go out walking and I'd practice the talk I'd be driving. I practice the talk. I mean, really I have to, for me, I had to get to the point where it was.

Speaker 2 (21:52):

So it wasn't just up in my head. It kind of has, I don't know how to describe this, had to drop from my head into my body. Right. And also part of that was to choreograph it. So, you know, like sometimes people have a way of rocking and, you know, they walk around the stage. You have a little, as far as I know for TEDx, there's you have your red circle, which can be a small rug or big rug, but I think you're not supposed to go off the rug. I've seen some Ted dot coms where they do it's a different staging, but the idea is you kind of are in a small space. So you have to practice being able to really stand fairly still, or like move a little bit. But when you're moving, not just because you're rocking, but we actually, I actually choreographed what I was doing and I do it like a performance to be honest with you.

Speaker 2 (22:40):

And so I got helped with that performance and I got had, you know, somebody I trusted and, and, you know, ultimately Tricia, you know, have somebody see me perform, tell me how to move. You know, maybe I should say it this way. And so it was for me, it was, I had the opportunity to prepare my TEDx talk over three months for the one the one in December of 2019. Then I actually performed it again for speakers who day or another Patricia Ray, after the pandemic. And I had to learn how to do it into a video, looking at myself, that's a whole other technique. And then finally, actually on a stage for a TEDx Farmingdale, which was not, it was live stream, but it was, I did not have a lot live audience. And so each thing each time was something different.

Speaker 2 (23:34):

So there's a preparation for what you think it's going to be. And then you show up and you have the experience. So it's, it's practice, practice, practice, practicing in front of people. And the other thing we learned is, you know, and then if you're going to practice in front of people two weeks before the talk, don't ask them, you know, you can say, I want to practice. But don't ask, don't have them like start ripping your talk apart, like a certain point. You have to have a few trusted people where they're going to give you good feedback, but it's not about redoing. The talk is a certain point. That's the talk, right. It's very interesting. It's a very it's a, it's a lengthy process. I hope, I hope that answers it. It's like you know,

Speaker 1 (24:18):

Oh yes, absolutely. Absolutely. And I just, I, I love that you're giving the list,

Speaker 2 (24:25):

The insight into these things

Speaker 1 (24:30):

Talks like, Hey, like this takes time, this is months of preparation. This is months of memorization. There are techniques to it. You know, you can memorize one sentence and memorize a sentence, add another sentence at another, till you have a paragraph, right. It's not like you're just going up there trying to memorize a nine minute talk right off the bat, because that's so daunting. And I, I want the listeners to know that you do have time before these talks that it's not like you apply. And they say, okay, see, in

Speaker 2 (25:01):

A week, right.

Speaker 1 (25:04):

Yeah, no, they want to make sure you're ready to, yeah.

Speaker 2 (25:07):

Thanks about the application I forgot to say is very often they ask for video. And so you do like a one to two minute video of yourself. Partly because they want to see who you are, how you speak at a sense. So it's not like if they select your, you just sort of seeing your application and that's it. And so that's always interesting because you know, that was in writing a piece of my talk, not, it was a way of giving, giving the essence of my talk. Actually what I did was I wrote something that was the essence of the talk without like doing the talk. Right. But giving them an opportunity to see me on camera, to get a sense of how I am as a speaker is really important. And that is always a challenge, right? Like I still, I've been doing this for a while and I say this so people understand, like, you know, have, have a little hope because if I can do it, honestly, if I can do it, other people can do it because it, it was an area that I wanted to do, but it was a challenge for me.

Speaker 2 (26:07):

And I had to learn to do everything, everything, it was always learning something new, something new. And again, I could say at my age, you know, it was tough, but that's not really what it was just, I hadn't learned how to do it before. Right.

Speaker 1 (26:19):

Yeah. Don't, don't, don't get too overwhelmed by it because you can learn,

Speaker 2 (26:24):

You can learn and that's really the point you really can learn. But I, you know, I, I say this with all all respect to anyone who wants to try this, if there's a way that they can find, you know, if you, they can find someone to help them with this. For me I'm one of those people, I've done many things in my life. I like to have somebody help guide me because it does seem so daunting. And so the other way, it just feels like, okay, I'm shooting in the dark. I'm not sure because you may never hear from the people that you've applied to. Right. So you have no idea why they didn't accept you. And so it's helpful to get some feedback and guidance from somebody who, who has some experience or expertise in this area.

Speaker 1 (27:11):

Yeah, absolutely. I couldn't agree more. I mean, we have coaches, like if you want to get better at tennis, you hire a tennis coach. If you want to get better at golfing, you hire a golf coach, you know, it's the same thing you want to get better at speaking, you hire a coach that can teach you how to be a good public speaker, which is why I joined the speaker salon way back when, why you did and, and here we are. Right. Right. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. I think that's great advice. Now, is there anything that we glossed over or any other points that you want to make about your experience on the TEDx

Speaker 2 (27:50):

Stage? Yeah, I just it it's I have to say if someone really wants to do it, I think that's half the battle. You really want to do it. You really, really there's something for me. It wasn't just like I did it halfway and said, Oh, this is too hard. There was something in me that felt like I had something I needed to say that, that, that, and that really is, it's something, it became something bigger than me. It wasn't just getting up and doing a talk. It had to be something for me to keep going, had to be something bigger that I felt like there was an important message that I needed to say. And I think that's part of it that that is part of what had me do it. And then go to a stage and say, this, this just wasn't the environment, like from a functional perspective, let alone, like, just that, for me, wasn't an alignment with what my talk was about.

Speaker 2 (28:53):

And I would rather not do it just to say I did it. I th there was a, there was a challenge in that for me, but ultimately I said, it wasn't about saying it just to say it and get it done. This was an important message. And I wanted to be on the stage that I can convey it to where I felt like it could get out. And so that desire that there's a bigger message and that desire for me if like that person in Spain, if there's one person out there that I can touch and make a difference, there's that ripple effect. So it's, it's, it's something that's bigger than us ultimately. And I think that's the important thing. And even like, starting with, you know, that, I don't know why am I the one to say it? Like we don't even know sometimes, but the more I worked on it, the more I realized it was something that had been for me to say for a long time, I just didn't know it.

Speaker 2 (29:45):

And so it grew and I grew, and there was something so beautiful for me when I finally got on that stage. I really, it really was, I was prepared. I was more than prepared, made up, dressed up a beautiful stage, great support. And and I, I have to say there was one moment where I was moved by my talk. Right. That's the other thing, you know, if you have emotion, but when you're doing your talk, you don't want other people to take care of you. Like they'll just fall apart on the stage. It's really like, you want them to have the experience. It's like, you're giving them a gift and you want them to have the experience. But there was a moment my husband even saw it where my eyes started watering up. I was so moved by what I was saying. It's like, every time I said it, it was new to me.

Speaker 2 (30:37):

It was new to me. That's the kind of talk. I think that we're looking for something that is so deeply important and satisfying and feel like I am the one to say the talk that, that, that is the thing that kept me going with all the challenges and all the new things to say I wanted to get there. And when I did it and walked off the circle is one of the most satisfying things. I, it really is a peak experience in my life. I've had a few of them. It's really, it's it probably at this point in my life feels like my greatest achievement, to be honest with you so strongly about it.

Speaker 1 (31:15):

Oh, that's so wonderful. Thank you for sharing that. And now Kate, where can people find you? Like I said, we will have the talk in the show notes for the, for this episode, but where can people find you if they want to do a Ted talk and they want to reach out to you for some advice and just where people can find you on on the regular, regular.

Speaker 2 (31:38):

Okay. I would say probably my, I am on LinkedIn, Kate McKinnon, spelled M a C K I N N O N. That's probably, you know, that's certainly a good place to reach out to me. I'm on Instagram. Funkshway K at funkshway Kate and Facebook I'm Kate McKinnon. But I also have a website at kate-mckinnon.com, M a C K I N, and r.com. M-Sci K I N N O N, that cog and you know, a place where you can send me an email that way as well. Also, I I'm reachable and you know, all of those are, you know, I check everything, so please feel free. I would be happy to, you know, people really want to talk with me about it, be my honor and pleasure. Really. That's awesome.

Speaker 1 (32:30):

Awesome. Thank you so much. And last question, knowing where you are now in your life and in your career, what would you give to

Speaker 2 (32:40):

Your younger self? Oh, I love this question. I, I would say, and I've said this to young women before, who kind of remind me of my younger self. Like I have an assistant working for me. It was like 23 years old. And I've had women like in their 1819 that I would say you have everything you need to be successful right now. The only difference between me and you is experience. I love it. That's great advice. Yeah. Excellent advice. Thank you so much, Kate. This was a great talk. And I think the listeners now have a better idea of what it takes to get on that TEDx stage. And we will regroup with you and Kaia and Trisha for the TEDx round table, which I'm really excited about. So thank you so much. Thank you, Karen. Thanks you so much for asking me to be on it's my honor, and privilege, and you know, to be able to talk about this, obviously I get really excited, but I, I really love sharing with people and I really hope that people really look to themselves to see where they might actually have that message that they want to do this.

Speaker 2 (33:57):

That would just mean the world to me. So, and I look forward to seeing you with Kaia and Tricia at the round table. Yes, I'm definitely looking forward to that one and everyone thanks so much for tuning in and listening. Have a great couple of days and stay healthy while at the, in smart.

 

May 17, 2021

In this episode, Creator of The Magnetic Soul-Work Success System, Keiya Rayne, talks about her process from no talk to TEDx talk.

Today, Keiya talks about leveraging the power of energy to land a TEDx talk, how to set yourself up for success, and how to achieve a calmness and confidence in the Red Circle. How did Keiya go from having no talk to stepping onto a TEDx stage?

Hear about the secret sauce to creating, developing, and delivering an Influencial talk, find out how the TEDx talk has changed Keiya, and get her advice for her younger self, all on today’s episode of The Healthy, Wealthy & Smart Podcast.

 

Key Takeaways

  • “We have all these different experiences of our lives, and when we bring them together it makes the essence of our lives, and it gives us a message that we can impart to others and help them improve their lives.”
  • “The secret sauce is hiring a mentor.”
  • “When you’re giving a TEDx talk, you want to appeal to a lot of people.”
  • “When you have an idea that’s worth spreading, then it’s universal.”
  • “The human energy is so powerful.”
  • Keiya’s 1-minute energy reset tool:

“Pivot, pause, smile.”

  • “The most important thing is to make the decision and have the intention to do so.”
  • “A lot of times we’re so focused on doing. I want to introduce the idea of the beingness - the energy of lightness about what you desire.”
  • “People buy from you based on how you make them feel.”
  • “A lot of times we’re afraid to even take that step. Set the intention to do that, apply, and go for it. If you have that desire, then the universe wants you to have it.”
  • “Nothing is ever going to replace rehearsing.”
  • “When you feel comfortable and confident, and you’ve embodied your talk, then you’re free.”
  • “Be still, and trust that everything is going to be okay.”

 

More about Keiya Rayne

Keiya K. RayneInfluential TEDx Speaker, Keiya K. Rayne, is a Clarity Coach, Relationship Expert, Intuitive Healer, and the Creator of The Magnetic Soul-work Success System.

Described by one of her clients as Yoda, but only cuter, for more than 15 years, she’s helped her clients master their mindset and attraction energy, so they're able to achieve a higher level of success in the areas of Love, Business, and Purpose with unexpected ease.

Keiya’s been featured in the documentary, The Big Talk Over Dinner: Race and immigration, The Big Talk, Follow me Friday, Courage Up podcasts, as well as various online magazines publications.

She’s a recipient of The White House President’s Volunteer Service Award for her humanitarian work domestically and globally.

 

Suggested Keywords

TEDx, TED Talk, Speaking, Public Speaking, Talking, Experience, Energy, Determination, Confidence, Preparation, Pivot, Pause, Smile,

 

Keiya’s TEDx talk: Being Taught to Form a Line is the Greatest Gift We Can Ever Receive

 

To learn more, follow Keiya at:

Website:          https://www.keiyakrayne.com

Facebook:       Keiya Rayne

Instagram:       @keiyakrayne

Twitter:            @keiyakrayne

LinkedIn:         Keiya Rayne

 

Subscribe to Healthy, Wealthy & Smart:

Website:                      https://podcast.healthywealthysmart.com

Apple Podcasts:          https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/healthy-wealthy-smart/id532717264

Spotify:                        https://open.spotify.com/show/6ELmKwE4mSZXBB8TiQvp73

SoundCloud:               https://soundcloud.com/healthywealthysmart

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iHeart Radio:               https://www.iheart.com/podcast/263-healthy-wealthy-smart-27628927

 

Read the Full Transcript: 

Speaker 1 (00:01):

Hey Caio, welcome to the podcast. I'm so excited to have you on, and it's so great to see you.

Speaker 2 (00:08):

Likewise, it's a pleasure to be here. It's like, you know, a family reunion side rail to be here

Speaker 1 (00:14):

This whole month. We're talking about how to get on a TEDx stage. And I was part of the speaker salon, which is by Tricia, Brooke, who is also a guest this month. And I met you and I met Kate and we're all getting together to talk about how to get on a TEDx stage and really just how to do a talk. Right? Yeah. So let's start. My first question is how did you go from having no talk to getting on the TEDx stage? I think

Speaker 2 (00:45):

Everybody wants to know. Yes, yes. That is, you know, it's a very fascinating story. I actually met Tricia Brooke at an event. And when I met her, there was something that was just in her energy that drew me to her and I just really fell in love with her. And of course she mentioned, she was, of course speaking about speaking. And I just casually mentioned to her, I'm like, you know, I'm going to get on your stage now. I did not really have an interest of getting on her stage. I, you know, I knew, you know, in my life like getting on a stage at some point in my life was going to happen. You know, I just, I just knew that, but at that particular time, I was really just kind of like, yeah, you know, that sounds good. Well, of course, two weeks later, I get this email from Trisha saying, Hey, I'm launching this week or salon and that's what happened. And so I did speak her salon and it was through the speaker salon. Now, when I arrived on the speaker salon, I had no talk whatsoever. And, you know, with Trisha, she really creates a safe space for you to just get up and share from your heart, from your soul. And I got up and whatever she was able to pull out of me you know, most people were like, wow. And so

Speaker 1 (02:12):

I can, yes, that is true. I will, I will agree with that.

Speaker 2 (02:17):

Right. And that's right, you were there. And and that was the making of my TEDx talk. And then later on I did another speaker salon and that was where one of the TEDx producers was in the audience. And that's how I landed my TEDx talk.

Speaker 1 (02:36):

Yes. And now let's talk about, so do you have, did you have a specific process by which you had your idea, you then took that idea and formulated your talk?

Speaker 2 (02:53):

Well, you know, thankfully the idea from my talk came from the speaker salon. And so for me, what was great about that was that I already had something. And so I was able to really just, and it's interesting because my TEDx talk had pieces of my speaker salon talk, and there's something that I will share later, but there's a little, the secret sauce that was, you know, really working with someone to help you do that. But it was really, you know, receiving the support, I believe from Tricia in working with that talk and being able to take it, it's fascinating because, you know, we was able to take all these different experiences that I've had and was able to bring them into this talk. And a lot of times, you know, we may think of ourselves like, well, you know, I don't really have a talk and not realizing that, you know, we have all these different experiences of our lives and when we bring them together and really makes the essence of our lives, and it really gives us something that we can a message that we can impart to others and, and, and help them improve their lives, inspire them in some way.

Speaker 2 (04:17):

So you don't have to reinvent the wheel to find these talks. You can look at your life experience, look at within yourself and say, Hey, wait, this happened to me and it might help someone else is abstinence kind of what I got. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And just keep in mind though, you know, TEDx talk is a very different type of talk, so it's not like it's a keynote talk or write it. It's a very specific type of talk, which I'm sure, you know, Trisha will elaborate on that a lot more, but either way, right. There were still all these different pieces that came together to create that top. Yeah. Right. And now you alluded to this before, but the secret sauce to creating, developing and delivering this impactful TEDx talk, what is that secret sauce? You know, it's, it's, it's, it's a V it's, it's simple, but it's not.

Speaker 2 (05:13):

And I'm going to tell you, the secret sauce is hiring a mentor and they'll just, you know, just hire Patricia, Brooke, because I, I just believe, and she doesn't even know what I'm saying this, but I really believe she she's just the best. I mean, she knows this inside and out, but she is, you know, she has a hearing and I, and this is something that she's really masterful at helping other people share their story. And so when you're able to find that type of person who can really help you in all these pieces, right. And then, you know, because like I said again, right. Tedx talk is, is is, you know, we suspend the islands and they may say it in America too. Like, you know, a horse of a different color, you know? So when you're getting on, when you're dealing with the red circle, right.

Speaker 2 (06:07):

You, you really need to know if that's right. If you want it to be impactful right. And influential, then you want to get someone who knows how to make that happen for you. Yeah. And I should also say, I'm glad that you kind of said, it's, it's different than a keynote talk. Right. Because when you're at a keynote talk and you're at a conference or something like that, you're really directing that talk to a specific group of people. Right. So you really have narrowed down in each down to maybe what is probably your ideal audience, but when you're giving a TEDx talk, you want to appeal to a lot of people. Was that difficult?

Speaker 2 (06:50):

It wasn't. And I'm going to tell you why. I didn't think it was difficult. I think it was because of the message, right. The idea worth spreading. And so when you have an idea that's worth spreading, then it's universal. Yeah. That's very true. Hey, wait a second. What was your TEDx talk about? We didn't even mention that yet. I mean, we'll mention it to get at the end, but what was, what was your TEDx talk about? Give us the cliff notes and then of course we'll have a link to it in the podcast. Exactly. Exactly. Well, it, it's how being taught to form a line is the greatest gift you can ever receive. And so all I'm going to say about that is, you know, we all learn how to form, you know, like what we were like in grade school, learn how to form a line and not realizing the impact that something as simple as that has had, have had on our lives, as well as, you know, other people around the world who really don't know how to form lines.

Speaker 2 (07:54):

Right. And through my humanitarian work, you know, I did humanitarian work for many, many years traveling around the world. And that was a big thing. Just getting people to form a line. And so that's kind of, you know, a little, I don't want to give it all away. No, no, no. Don't give it all the way we want people to go and watch it and listen to your words. Yeah. So now let's take us to that moment of when it was your turn to give your talk, you have to go into the quote unquote red circle. So how do you set yourself up energetically for success? How do you stay calm? Cause I feel like if I was wearing my Garmin watch, my heart rate would be like 106. Like it would be off the charts. I would be so nervous. So how do you do this?

Speaker 2 (08:42):

Well, you know, the thing is, you know, the nerves are there, but energetically, you know, I started setting myself up and which is something I do every day. Right. So it is a, it is a non-negotiable practice for me to really set myself up energetically every day. And that is, you know, through meditation, through journaling, through you know, getting quiet and doing all those things that will enable me to really get into a calm state and, you know, the more you practice it right in, and you're in, you know, that right? So the more that, you know, so that is something that I've practiced for so long. And so that when it was time for me to get on the stage, I had that to reach back to. And so I, I really was able to kind of channel right. Being calm because it was, it was something that practice because when you're ready to go on that stage, it's just, I mean, you know, everything is happening.

Speaker 2 (09:44):

You're what am I going to remember my lines? And, and it wasn't the time for that. And, and just to get in the zone, but when you set yourself up for that, right, you, you are really working on your vibration on, on, on your nervous system and calming yourself down, you know, then that makes that that's a game changer, because that was one of the things that I heard quite a bit was you looked so calm when you gave your talk, you know, it was like, you just, you were just walking, like you were floating. It is like, Hey, you don't know how much, you know, right. It was all that meditation and breathing exercise that I did.

Speaker 1 (10:23):

I think that's a really great point for people to understand is that you're still nervous, but you had some tools to help mitigate that a little bit. Now, would you recommend, let's say someone they want to get on a TEDx stage and let's say they're accepted. We'll just throw that out there. Is this something that you would recommend someone to do in preparation for that or just something to do just because you're a human being

Speaker 2 (10:49):

Living in this world? Well, both, I think just, you know, just as a human being, living in this world, right. We have so much to deal with and I'm really, really big on, you know, mastering your energy and understanding, you know, the human and the human energy is so powerful. And I think it's one of those things that we as humans don't really give a lot of attention to, you know, like we just don't realize the power of, of our energy and, and of our vibration and how, when we learn to manage that, and we can also use, we can also learn to leverage that as well. So it's, you know, when you learn how to do the two, wow. Yeah. It really, it, it, it puts you in the center and it really assist you in every area of your life.

Speaker 1 (11:43):

And do you have for the listeners, if they're curious, like, what the heck is she talking about? How can I do that? Do you have like a quick example of how someone do that, or even where they can find out more information about how to do that?

Speaker 2 (11:58):

Well, you know, it's, that's a great question. And one of the things that I was going to that I'm offering the listeners is what I call a one minute energy reset tool. Right. And what that is. Right. And it's, it's a one minute tool that we can use to always bring ourselves back to the moment. And it's called pivot, pause, smile. Right. Very, very simple. But it's very powerful. Right. And so as, even as you're going through your day and you're like stressed out, and if we just think to pause and you think, okay, I'm going to pivot my energy in this moment. I'm just going to put a smile on my face. Right. In that moment, you can change it. But as well, there are tons of, you know, whether it be method, meditation, breathing exercises, there's quite a bit, but I think the most important thing, right. Because you can find it if you want, it is to make the decision and have the intention to do so. Yeah. And this

Speaker 1 (13:04):

Is the kind of stuff that I know you probably work with with your clients on the regular, right.

Speaker 2 (13:10):

Oh, 100% because it's not negotiable.

Speaker 1 (13:15):

Yeah. And, and now let's talk about, so we talked about how to kind of set yourself up for when you get into that red circle, but what about landing a Ted talk? I mean, that's stressful as well. Right. So can you walk us through your process of how you, like, how did you choose which one, how did you foster your energy toward landing that go ahead. Okay. So

Speaker 2 (13:49):

In my case, I was actually, you know, because I was, I was kind of recruited if you will. Right. It was like, I was auditioning without realizing I was auditioning for a TEDx talk. And, you know, at the end of Tisha speaker salon, she has people come in various influencers and producers come in. And so in that sense, I was fortunate that sort of the introduction was already made for me because he saw me and it was like, Hmm, I wanna meet her. However, I still needed to apply. And so this is, I feel like it's my secret sauce, right? W in, in terms of applying. So I actually want to go back to when I was giving my talk. Now I knew there were going to be produces influences in the audience. And so I actually had set myself up and a genetically from then to attract and land buy talk.

Speaker 2 (15:02):

It's really, really important. Right. And so would, that would look like was, again, in my morning practice eyes, you know, set the intention one that, Hey, wouldn't it be great to be chosen by one of the influences or one of the produces. So that was an intention that was already set, right? So there's, there's that energetic piece there sending myself up. This was even when I got on stage to do speaker salon, and again, just having the, what I call the universal law of detachment. And so I wasn't attached to whether I got chosen or not. It was just really important for me to, to give an impactful and inspirational and transformation, transformative talk, but I just want to plant the seed right. That it started. So the, the energy, the energy of everything that you do starts from the very beginning.

Speaker 2 (16:11):

And so I will tell you, I wasn't surprised by the fact that I was chosen in a way, because I had sort of said that intention, and there was an energy, right. That I was putting out there for that. And not to say that other people weren't doing it right. Because it's, everybody's like, they're putting out, I want to give a talk. Right. But there's something about when you understand and which I spoke about before, when you understand how to leverage energy and you really get to understand the power of attraction that we have to attract what we desire into our lives. Right. And so with all of that, all of that, knowing if you will, which is what my speaker salon talk was about, I think created that vibration within me. Right. So that whoever was in the audience, it made it possible. Right. For kind of, for them to define me. Does that, does that make sense?

Speaker 1 (17:19):

Yes. And I, I really love that. What was it? The universal law of detachment. Yes. I really I'm. I don't think I've ever heard that before, but I really like it because if you go, it, it sounds to me and correct me if I'm wrong, but you went into this talk with that sort of love detachment. So it wasn't like your whole being was, was predicated on this talk. Right. Is that right? That's exactly correct. Exactly.

Speaker 2 (17:50):

Correct. And it's also when you learn how to use universal laws and university and just energy. Right. And so these laws are set up to, to support us and we don't know about them. And so would that combination, right? That, that was sort of the, like the, the game, if you will. Right. I was playing, that was w that enabled me to create that sense of lightness. Right. And, and so, and I say that because now let's think about the person who's now applying. Right. So I, I still had to apply, but I was kind of like in, because he saw me. So let's say for the person that you know, is not in front of a producer, and now they're applying to a TEDx talk. And what I want to, what I'd love to invite that person to do is because everything is energy.

Speaker 2 (18:47):

And so even when you were filling out that application, if you're filling out that application with the energy of desperation, Oh my God, I really want to give this talk. And, and, and, but there's so many other, all of that, right. You're, you're going there is just like, you're going to block yourself from attracting that talk. Now I'll tell you something. I heard I was listening to two women speak about applying for TEDx talks and, and both women had already given TEDx talks. And so they were speaking of applying for other TEDx talks. And as I listened to both of them, I can hear the level of, sort of the level of, of stress and frustration in, in, in, in, in all that it takes right. To apply for the TEDx talk and right away, I was like, wow, just, just that alone, just that energy that you even, you know, coming to it from where you're coming from with it will impede the process.

Speaker 1 (20:02):

Yeah. That makes a lot of sense. And, and I think, I just want to make a clarification when you're talking about that universal law of detachment, it doesn't mean that you're filling it out and saying, Oh, whatever, if I get it, I don't really care. Is that right? Cause that was kind of coming, especially as you were speaking just now I was thinking, wait a second. That doesn't mean that you're like blahzay and like, whatever.

Speaker 2 (20:27):

Right. Not at all, not at all, not at all. It's, you know, it's, it's, it's kind of, you do your part and then you release it.

Speaker 1 (20:36):

That makes sense. Yeah. So you're still doing your part with the best intentions with all your, with your energy and your, this is the ASM. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. And, and I bring, and I

Speaker 2 (20:48):

Bring, you know, and I bring, I keep going. I, you know, I go back to the energy piece a lot because, you know, again, for the, let's say for the person who's applying for that top, right. W w w a lot of times we're so focused on doing yes, yes. Right. And so, and we do that with everything. Like, I want something I'm going to go after, what do I have to do to get it?

Speaker 1 (21:09):

We often say that in an email, what do I have to do? What, what are the next steps? What I have to do next? What do I, yeah, totally,

Speaker 2 (21:16):

Exactly. Right. And so I want to really introduce the idea of the beingness of that energy of lightness, about what you desire and what you want, be it a TEDx talk or anything else, because it's that sort of, that energy of likeness that, you know, I feel makes, makes you more of a magnet to that. And so you're not impeding it with your okay, I got to do. And, but also as well is that you're leveraging, right. You're leveraging energy in a way, instead of just, you know, all of the, like, what do I got to do? And you're trying to make this happen. Right. It's like, you kind of like, okay, because then the right person will be put in your path, your application, you know, the person that is reading your application that is watching your video. Right. They are going to feel you, they can feel right. So everything is, and so that's why it's so important to bring in, I feel the energetic piece. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (22:30):

And thank you for that. I think that's great advice for anyone out there that wants to with the, with the aspirations and the hopes of getting on a Ted ex or maybe even a Ted stage. Yes. At some point that will come, these live events will come back. I know it. And, and what has changed for you since you did your TEDx talk?

Speaker 2 (22:57):

Oh my God. So much, so much, so much in terms of, you know, I will say even my, my level, just my level of confidence that in and of itself, I think my, you know, the income, my clients, just my entire, just everywhere in, in all aspects of my life has really gone to a completely different level, you know, since doing the TEDx and more importantly, just me as a person. Right. I have evolved and grown since then. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (23:30):

Yeah. Cause oftentimes people, you know, if you're an entrepreneur, you have your own business, you may, part of going onto the TEDx stage is yes. Of course, to get your message out, but also like, will this help my business?

Speaker 2 (23:43):

Absolutely. Yeah. And it sounds

Speaker 1 (23:46):

Like people have found you, people have started to want to work with you, which is amazing. Absolutely. Absolutely. And, and that, that's, what's great about, I think just taking the stage in general, really, because people have an opportunity to to hear you. Right. And so as an entrepreneur, it makes it a little easier, right. In terms of you don't need to go looking for people because they've heard you, they've seen you and it, it kind of gives them an insight into who you are. They get to feel you, they get to connect with you. And you know, when people buy from you based on how you make them feel. Absolutely. Absolutely. I love it. Now. Is there anything during this talk, did we, did I gloss over anything? Did we miss anything? And if we did, let me know if we didn't, what's your best advice for someone wanting to get on a TEDx stage,

Speaker 1 (24:45):

You know, hire Tricia, Brooke. I could second that yes. You know what, we're not, we're not paid to do that. No, we're not right. I'm just going to keep it real, you know what I'm saying? Like, and, and I say that, and I'm gonna tell you why I say that. Right. and also you, right. First of all, if you have the, the, the desire and the intention to do so, go for it. Like just, you know, I think that's the most important, I think a lot of times we're afraid to even take that step. And sometimes someone might think, Hey, you know, a TEDx it's too big. Cause a lot of people will look at that TEDx talk or tend to be like, Oh my God. Right. Like I could never do that. Right. And so, you know, besides hiring Tricia had, you know, said that intention to do that apply and go for it because if you have that desire, then that the universe wants you to have it.

Speaker 1 (25:44):

Yeah. And, and, you know, working with Trisha or with any other coach, I think just really, really important. I remember during our speaker salon, like I remember people going up and speaking and I was sitting there thinking, I thought this was supposed to be for like, non-professional speakers. Why is everyone like a professional already? And I got up and I was like shrinking in my chair, like, Oh, this is amazing. This is not good. This is amazing. But having Trisha there, cause I remember my idea of doing my talk about my experience with pain. And I was speaking about it in the third person. And I remember a Trisha like, like I was, you know, just maybe a couple of minutes in and she was like that was really good. But let me ask you a question. Is this about you? And I was like, yeah, it's just like, why, why are you talking in the third person? And it's those and that,

Speaker 2 (26:44):

It's those simple things that we would never be aware of and never. And the other thing I want to say about that too, was that, you know, when I, when I was done with my talk, I was able to, with my TEDx talk, I was able to go into the audience and sit and you know, support and watch the other speakers as well. And there was there was a difference, it was a clear distinction and difference, right. Between the people that, you know, had, I'm able to Tricia speakers in particular because there was, I think two of them that went after me. Right. and the other speakers. And so it, it really

Speaker 2 (27:29):

Separates you. Yeah. And I would think, and this is, this will be the lab. Maybe we could talk forever, but I think practice, practice, practice. How much did you practice? Let's not gloss over this. Yes, that's right. That's right. Thank you so much. Because when you said was there something that we forgot that was it because in my mind I was like, I, I gotta remember that. So yes. Well all we got all the energy, right. You're, you're centered. You're, you know, you're you're you got your energy together. Nothing. And I mean, add absolutely nothing is going to replace

Speaker 3 (28:19):

Rehearsing. Yes.

Speaker 2 (28:20):

Memorizing. And so what gave me that confidence also, right. To be calm was the fact that I knew that talk inside and out and, you know, and, and, you know, Tricia taught us also how to memorize. And so that for me was, was really the key because then, you know, when you feel comfortable and confident and you've embodied your talk, then you free. So thank you for bringing that up because I really wanted to like, make sure that we said, Oh yeah, I can just use my energy. And then yes. Yes. And just to give the listeners some insight how, if you could even remember how many hours do you think you rehearsed? Cause it's not like five hours. It's not like you just did it a couple of times. No, no, no, man. You know, it's, it's kinda 24 seven almost really like I'm, I'm serious.

Speaker 2 (29:31):

Like I, you know, in the beginning, you know, and I think we kind of, I give myself like a little bit of a leeway, like kind of in the beginning I was like, okay, let me, you rehearse. I think for the last, and I didn't have a whole lot of time. I had, how much time did you have since, since you knew you were going to get the talk till the day you gave it. Exactly. And it was unusual, right. Because usually people can have, I think like up to six months, I think I found out, I think speaker salon was like July 20th and September 7th. Oh boy. Yeah. Okay. Right. I think it was either June, June, or July. And so I had very little time because I think I was the last person that came on board. Okay. Right. But, but I think we all, we all found out at the same time, but but I mean, because I didn't apply, so I didn't even kind of, I hadn't applied yet.

Speaker 2 (30:26):

So I kind of didn't even know that I would even be chosen. So it was a very, a very short period of time, which meant rehearsing, rehearsing, memorizing. Like I ate, slept, drank that talk so that I can embody it. So I didn't have to deal with the nerves. Right, right. Excellent. Well, this was great. Now Kaia, where can people find you on social media website, et cetera, et cetera. Awesome. Awesome. Thank you. Yes. People can find me@caiorain.com. Kaia K rain. Actually, I'm going to spell it for you even. I know you're going to have the link. It's K E I Y a K R a Y N e.com. And you can also find me on Instagram and if I'm making it easy for you, everything is Kaia K rain, Instagram, LinkedIn, all those good places. Excellent. Well, thank you so much. And I, Oh, I almost forgot. I have one last question. Knowing where, and I ask everyone this, but knowing where you are now in your life and in your career, what advice would you give to your younger self? Wow, that is, I love, love, love, love, love this question.

Speaker 4 (31:46):

Yeah.

Speaker 2 (31:48):

Be still and trust that everything is going to be okay. Fabulous advice. You know, because when I look back and if we all look back at our lives and we look at all the things that we stressed out about and we worried about it and we made ourselves crazy about like every little thing. If you real, if you knew that if I can just have a sense of trust and just chill, I was going to say, chill the hell out. Right. Things are going to work out. So that's, that would be my advice. Excellent advice. And I thank you again. And of course everyone, we will have links to everything Kaia, including her TEDx talk in the notes at podcast

Speaker 1 (32:40):

Dot healthy, wealthy, smart.com. Thank you so much for coming on this one.

Speaker 2 (32:44):

Wonderful. Thank you. Oh, this was great. Thank you so much for having me. It was fantastic.

Speaker 1 (32:50):

And I'll tell you listeners, thank you so much for listening. Have a great week and stay healthy, wealthy and smart.

May 3, 2021

On this episode of the Healthy, Wealthy and Smart Podcast, I welcome Tricia Brouk to talk about how to land a TEDx Talk. Tricia is an international award-winning director, author, speaking coach, and podcast coach. 

In this episode, we discuss:

  • What is a TED talk?
  • How do you get chosen?
  • Why do you need to vet organizers?
  • What makes an exceptional TED talk?
  • How do you prepare?

 

Resources:

Round Table Talks

 

Tricia's Website: Tricia Brouk

 

www.TheBigTalkAcademy.com

 

www.speakersalonapplication.com

 

Tricia's Social Media: 

 

LinkedIn

 

Facebook

 

Twitter

 

Instagram

 

YouTube

 

Podcast

 

More About Tricia: 

Tricia Brouk is an international award-winning director. She has worked in theater, film, and television for three decades. Her work includes the writing of two musicals, both produced in New York City, a one-woman show, and four documentaries, two eligible for Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences nominations. She had an extensive career as a dancer performing all over the world. In addition to her work in the entertainment industry, Tricia applies her expertise to the art of public speaking. Tricia founded The Big Talk Academy where she certifies speakers in the art of public speaking. She was the executive producer of Speakers Who Dare and TEDxLincolnSquare and now The Big Talk Live. She has shepherded more than fifty speakers onto more than fifteen TEDx stages in under three years. She is currently being featured in a new documentary called Big Stages, which highlights the transformation of her speakers. Tricia’s commitment and devotion to inclusion is a priority as all of her shows, events, and communities are diverse. She curates and hosts the Speaker Salon in NYC, The Big Talk, an award-winning podcast on iTunes and YouTube. She directed and produced The Big Talk Over Dinner: Race and Immigration that premiered at the Be Your Best Self Expo in 2020. She was awarded Top Director of 2019 by the International Association of Top Professional and is relentless about her vision of amplifying voices all over the world. Her book, The Influential Voice: Saying What You Mean For Lasting Legacy was #1 New Release on Amazon in December 2020. Tricia lives in New York City with her husband, Joe Ricci, and their two cats, Lola and Bella. Their building faces the Alvin Ailey Dance Theater where she gets to watch young dancers realize their dreams every single day.

 

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Read the full transcript here:

Speaker 1 (00:01):

Hi, Tricia. Welcome back to the podcast. Third time. Third time on I'm so excited to have you here.

Speaker 2 (00:08):

I am so excited to be birth. Third time, Karen, it's always awesome to talk with you.

Speaker 1 (00:14):

Agreed, agreed. Awesome to talk to you. Not to me. Now this month we're talking all about TEDx talks, how to get on that stage. We've spoken to, we're going to speak to a couple of TEDx speakers, which I'm really excited about and you help prepare speakers for the TEDx stage. So we've got a lot to talk about. My number one question is what is a Ted talk?

Speaker 2 (00:43):

This is such a great question. And for anybody out there who really wants to dig deep and go into the world of Ted Chris Anderson's book, the official guide to public speaking, Ted talks, the official guide to public speaking is really the place that you need to go. A Ted doc is an 18 minute or less talk. And Chris Anderson actually says, 12 is the new 18. It is a gift, not an anus. It is an idea, not an issue. And you want the audience to adopt your idea as their own. At the end of this talk, a Ted talk is an idea worth spreading, and it is really meant to get the audience to think differently. And there's very specific format and outline when it comes to what a Ted talk is. And I highly recommend you dig deeper with Chris Anderson's book.

Speaker 1 (01:37):

Yeah. And for those who are watching here, it is. I just happened to have it coincidentally right on my bookshelf next to me. So this is the book. Great. And, and because I do want to differentiate that a Ted talks, not a keynote talk,

Speaker 2 (01:54):

Right? A Ted talk is 18 minutes or less, and it's really all about getting the audience to think differently. A keynote is 45 to 60 minutes long, and the keynote is going to start out by you telling the audience why you're the credible expert to talk about this idea. You're going to share with us what you're going to cover. Then you're going to cover it. Then you're going to summarize what you covered. And then there's a very clear call to action, which is buy my book, sign up for my program, donate to a worthy cause. And when you're thinking about that in relationship to a Ted talk, it is so different because literally you can open a Ted style, talk with music. This is how I see the world though, through Spiaggia trickle lens, you can open with music with video, with compelling slides. And it's really about taking the audience on a journey from where you start. What is the idea worth spreading that you want the audience to think about, taking them on a personal journey, your personal story, or someone else's personal story, and then wrapping up so that they think differently and potentially walk out of that theater, adopting idea, adopting your way of thinking as their own and maybe even behaving differently in the world.

Speaker 1 (03:06):

Yeah. And I, a great example of that is a Ted talk from Ted X, Lincoln square that you produced on forgiveness. You know, the one, I mean, right.

Speaker 2 (03:18):

I do Sarah Montana, one of the most compelling speakers I've ever had on my stage, she applied to TEDx Lincoln square with a talk about forgiveness. The idea was about forgiveness and how do we teach people to forgive? We all know forgiveness is important. It's good for our health. It's really important, but nobody teaches you how to do it. So in her application, the written application, she submitted her talk about forgiveness with a personal story that her mother and brother were murdered on Christmas Eve. And I thought, how in the world is this woman going to be able to share an idea worth spreading from the stage where I don't feel bad, the audience doesn't feel bad. We are not just sad hearing her talk about this horrible tragedy in her life. So I gave myself the challenge Garren, I thought, okay, I'm going to challenge myself and ask her to submit a video because I could not imagine how this story could be shared in a way that was an idea we're spreading.

Speaker 2 (04:22):

That would get me to think differently. All I could focus on was the trauma. So she submitted this incredible video and what was wonderful about this, and this is really an important takeaway here. She was healed from the trauma. She did not share a vulnerable story before she was ready. And she was able to tell us the story. So she set up context and then take us on the journey of her journey of forgiveness and how she ended up forgiving so that we could potentially put into motion, her practices of forgiveness into our own lives. And that is an incredible example of someone who is sharing a powerful idea, worth spreading, also giving context and her personal journey so that we can observe as the audience member not feel bad, but observe and adopt this idea as our own.

Speaker 1 (05:19):

Yeah, I, it was such a powerful story. We'll have a link to it in the show notes. It was just so wonderful. And that actually leads perfectly into my next question is how does one get chosen? So you gave us a little bit of the backstory of how she was chosen, but for the listeners who are thinking, Oh, I really want to do a TEDx talk or a Ted talk one day, how does that happen?

Speaker 2 (05:41):

This is really great. You have a million search engines looking for Ted talks all the time. The best thing to do is start with cities, TEDx, Philadelphia, TEDx, New York, TEDx, Dallas, TEDx St. Louis TEDx, all cities. It doesn't have to be where you live, but there will be amazing Ted X events in major cities, TEDx, Los Angeles. That's where you want to start, because the reason you want to start there is that they will have been around for a while and they will know what they're doing. And we'll get into that leader of the next step is universities, TEDx, university of Nevada TEDx case Western reserve, university TEDx rush, you universities put on TEDx events all the time. And the other reason that's a great place to start is because they will have the support of the school. They will have the support of the, of the university.

Speaker 2 (06:38):

Tedx UCLA is an Epic event. It's really hard to get into that one. And it's wonderful. And that's because they've been around for awhile, they know what they're doing. So cities, universities, and then you can actually go to ted.com and they have a map of all the TEDx events in the world. So if you want to speak in Ghana, if you want to speak in the UK, if you want to speak in New Zealand, you can search the map and it will identify where those TEDx events are happening. And then you just get in touch with the organizer. So the next thing you want to do is subscribe to all of the TEDx events that you can get on their mailing list so that you are notified when the applications open applications are rolling for many events, meaning you can apply all year and many have a specific window. So you want to make sure that you don't miss that six, eight week window where their applications are open. And this happened to one of my clients. She lives in Chicago. I gave her the application information. We worked on her application for months, months so that it would be right. She knew the deadline and she missed the deadline

Speaker 1 (07:55):

For heartbreaking. It was

Speaker 2 (07:57):

So heartbreaking. There was a little bit of is this self sabotaging thing happening right now. So just know that they do close. So make sure that you understand if you're notified, get those dates on your calendar, create a spreadsheet for yourself. Because if you believe you're going to apply to one event and land that event, you're a unicorn. I

Speaker 1 (08:18):

Have had unicorns. Trust

Speaker 2 (08:21):

Me. I haven't had unicorns. I currently have a unicorn, Dr. Kristin Donnelley, we just started working together and her first application was accepted. So she's going to be speaking itself, Lake Tahoe in may, which is super exciting. It does happen. However, she'd got my support. So if you are working on applications, apply to as many as possible. And if you are chosen for more than one, guess what you can do more than one, or you can determine which one you actually prefer. And you can take that stage. So making sure that you start with cities, moved universities, go to ted.com and search that way. Google is not your friend here. There's a million million, million ways that you can go around that and find the actual events that you want to speak out. And

Speaker 1 (09:07):

Let's say, I, there are three TEDx events that I want to speak at. Can I submit the same talk to all three? Or should I have a different talk for each one?

Speaker 2 (09:18):

Submit the same idea. We're spreading to as many applications as possible. And when, and if you're chosen for more than one, you can determine with the organizer. When you want to switch your idea, most organizers, 99.9% organizers are not going to let you do the same talk at multiple stages. You can absolutely speak at multiple stages, but you want to speak with the organizer about, Hey, I just accepted TEDx South Lake Tahoe, and I'm talking about tolerance. Can I talk about empathy at your event? It's similar, but I want to talk about something different and you can have that conversation with the organizer.

Speaker 1 (09:56):

And when it comes to the applications themselves, is there, are there any tips or tricks or to make yourself stand out?

Speaker 2 (10:08):

Yes. Very, very important that you do not pitch your business. This is not about how to get sales. This is about an idea worth spreading. So if you have a business where you are connecting rescue animals, to people who need support and that's your business, that is not your idea. We're spreading. You have to dig deeper and find a reason to talk about why animals can serve us in humanity. The other thing is, if they're asking you a little bit about yourself, go, go above and beyond. Don't cut and paste your bio. Tell us who you are. Tell us that you love cooking. Tell us that you absolutely that you've been married. And then you have two cats or personal things. The reason that is going to make you stand out is because nobody else is doing it. I coach all of my speakers to incorporate who they are in that question.

Speaker 2 (11:05):

Tell us more about who you are. And that is because you want to be a human being. When producers are choosing their speakers, it starts with the idea worth spreading, and then it moves into do I want to work with this person for nine months? And if you are high maintenance or lazy by cutting and pasting a bio into the application, we take cues. We are looking for who you are in those applications, which means if I say, I want one line for your idea worth spreading, and you write three, you can't read directions. You're not going to follow the rules, which means you're going to be difficult to work with once I book you. So I'm not going to, I'm not going to choose you. If you submit a video. And I say, I want a two minute video and it's two minutes and three seconds. You just disqualified yourself because I have hundreds of other people who are actually following the rules. So it's really important when you apply to these events that you answer the questions they're asking, you do not pitch your business and do not cut and paste a bio because that tells us you're lazy or somebody else supplied for you. Not you.

Speaker 1 (12:15):

Ah, I love the rule following thing. I'm a rule follower, but it, you know, I think that's great for the listeners here because that's how specific TEDx talks are because hundreds of people are applying. So like you said, if I say one sentence, you give me three. They're not even, they're not, you're not going beyond that. It's a next

Speaker 2 (12:38):

That's right. That's how I do all of my operations. It, we don't have, but not brutal, but smart, efficient, efficient. Yeah. We don't have time to handhold. We want to work with speakers who we know are going to show up prepared. And if we say you have eight minutes that they're going to actually deliver eight minutes. Because ultimately, if you are working with an exceptional TEDx producer who knows how to produce a show, they are putting on a show. There is a journey here. There is an arc and a through-line to that performance, to that show, to that event, which means you're going to put you in specific orders as speakers so that the audience goes on a journey. And I say specifically, a good TEDx producer. And that's something that is really, really important to remember. Not all Ted TEDx events are created equally. Not all TEDx events are going to give you the support that you need. So it's really important that you understand that as well, when you're looking for events

Speaker 1 (13:41):

And how can you pick that out? Like if you're like a newbie to the TEDx world, this is your first time applying, how do you, how do you know who's good and who's not good.

Speaker 2 (13:53):

First thing you want to do is go to the YouTube channel and watch the videos from past events. If the sound is bad, if the set is wonky, if the lighting is terrible, you can't trust that event's going to be improved. If you decide you do want to speak, there, have a conversation with the organizer, making sure that they have the proper audio and video. That's the first place you want to start. The next thing you want to do is get in touch with people who have spoken at those events. And this is the thing that people are afraid of, or have not been given permission to do. Karen, it's reached out to other speakers who had the experience. They will tell you the truth. They, if it's a good event, they will tell you it's a good event. And they may even put you in touch with some of the organizers, some of the, the the volunteers, so that you can talk with them about the process.

Speaker 2 (14:45):

So make contact, reach out, ask all the questions you want to ask. Were the organizers micromanaging your script. If they were think about that, did they take your voice out of your talk and make it their voice? If they did, you need to think about that. You need to create boundaries immediately, which means I'm so excited that I'm going to be speaking at your event. I am very, very competent in terms of writing my script. I will absolutely take your feedback, but the final script is mine. Not yours, set boundaries right away. People are afraid to actually tell organizers what they want. And that's something that I want to invite you and all of you to give permission so that you take back the control. It's your talk. Now let's be real. You do not own that. Talk. Once you take a Ted stage, head owns it. It is forever there's you cannot do it anywhere else. So be, be mindful, your image and your script will belong to Ted for the rest of eternity, which is also why you do not want a bad video to end up on YouTube for the rest of your life, because you have zero control over it. You cannot take it down. So really important that you vet organizers and that you're clear on how they work, what the process is. And if it's something that you are willing to champion or risk. Yeah, I would be safe.

Speaker 1 (16:15):

So nervous to say that to a Ted organizer. I mean, just because that's my personality, as you know, I would be like, Oh, well, you know, I mean, this is, this is what I want to do. And if it's okay with you, I'd like to do it this way. So to be able to set those boundaries, but not be dismissive of them. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (16:37):

Right. Their event, you want to honor, it's their event and Bay. They are the producer of this particular TEDx event. And you can absolutely respect all of that. And I encourage you to take that very seriously. They're in charge and reminding them that it's your idea worth spreading. They chose you for a reason and they need to allow you to be your amazing self and not try to infuse you with something else in that moment.

Speaker 1 (17:06):

Yeah. And, and that makes perfect sense. And you just have to keep your, have your confidence in yourself

Speaker 2 (17:12):

And in what you're doing. Absolutely. And I've had speakers who are extremely seasoned that I've worked with, who have come back to me because the TEDx events will, will provide you with a speaker coach for free. And I've had clients come back to me and say, the speaker coach thinks we need to do it this way. And they want to take this out of our script. And I'm really freaking out right now. It's two weeks before the event and all these nerves. And like all this panic, my talk is terrible. All that happens until you say, thank you so much for your feedback. I really, really appreciate it. And I'm going to do the talk I've written and they all say, no problem, no problem. They all say no problem.

Speaker 1 (17:53):

Excellent. Well, that is great advice for, for those folks out there, like me who are like, Oh, I don't, you know, want to offend anyone. And so that is really, really good to know. And the other thing that you said earlier that I just want to circle back on is when you're vetting these TEDx producers, you said that this might be someone you're working with for nine months. What can you explain that

Speaker 2 (18:20):

If you are going to work with a TEDx producer or say yes to an event, it needs to be yes. To an event that is not two weeks from the day you're accepted my event applications, whether it was TEDx Lincoln square or speakers who dare applications opened up in September, I made the decision in December and then the event was in March. So January, February, there was three months of speakers preparing. Now. They were also submitting in September. So September, October, November, December, January, February, that's eight months where I was spending time with these speakers, watching their videos, reading their applications. So you will want to have at least three months no less to prepare for your event. If you're being asked to speak in an event that happens in less than four weeks, I would gracefully decline because you are not going to have enough time to write a powerful talk and memorize it so that you can be your best self on that stage. And trust me, it has happened many organizers. This is really important. The one question Ted X does not ask on the application to become a licensed holder and organizer is, do you know how to produce an event?

Speaker 2 (19:52):

Anyone can get a TEDx license if they go through the process and they're granted a license, not everyone knows how to produce an event. And that is why vetting is important. And it's also important for you to know that this is an opportunity for you to share a very important message that you care deeply about in order to serve in order to reach people. The Ted brand is a massive platform. You have an opportunity to end up on ted.com and reach millions of people, which is why you want to set yourself up for absolute success and have a runway so that you can write an amazing talk, get the coaching you need, and then perform it beautifully. And that leads

Speaker 1 (20:39):

Perfectly into my next question. You answered it a little bit just then, but what makes an exceptional Ted talk?

Speaker 2 (20:48):

If the talk is really truly an idea worth spreading, that's the audience to think differently. And if you are activating from the stage, which means, you know how to deliver this content in a way that is how is MADEC in control in command while also sharing the idea worth spreading. And it doesn't mean teaching. It means sharing the idea worth spreading gifting, this idea, making sure that it's not an issue. And it's truly an idea. For example, teachers in public schools do not get enough support financially. We all know that to be true. It is an issue. If we reframe that as teachers are the GPS of our children's future, that is an idea. So really be clear that you are sharing an idea worth spreading, that you were in command of the material that you care about it, and that you are gifting this material to the audience so that they adopted as their own.

Speaker 1 (21:56):

And that was a great example, just switching the, the framework of the title makes all the difference. And, and I like that. It's, it's an idea, not an issue, an idea worth spreading, not an issue that we all kind of know, or maybe take for granted or something, right? Yeah. And that makes a big difference. Okay. How do you prepare for a Ted talk or a TEDx talk? It seems so daunting.

Speaker 2 (22:25):

It's the same preparation. If you are a speaker for any kind of stage, you are about to take, you begin with the writing process. You write and you rewrite and you write and you rewrite and you edit and you kill your darlings and you end up hating your talk and you think it's terrible. And you get past that part of the process. And now you have your, your final talk, your script. Then you begin to memorize. There is nothing sexy about memorization. It is boring. It is wrote. It is hard work. It's bicep girls it's plays. It is over and over and over start with the first sentence, move to the second, finish that paragraph. If you cannot prevent yourself from glancing down at the script, you are not memorized in that first paragraph. Do not do not cheat yourself. You want to make sure that first paragraph is memorized before you move on to the next, once you have the next paragraph, go back to the burst and tie those two together with the transition.

Speaker 2 (23:27):

So the last sentence of the first paragraph with the first sentence of the second paragraph, connect those dots. Once you have that and you are in complete control of those two paragraphs, then move on once you've done that through the whole talk, start in the middle and go to the end. Then mistake speakers make again. And again is they have the first half memorized cause they keep starting at the beginning and then they get on stage and nerves happen and they can't remember the second half. Once you have it all memorized, go back to the middle and work on the middle to the end. Once you are truly memorized and you can also record yourself doing the talk and listen to it in the car and listen to it on the treadmill, listen to it outside. When you're walking, when we're listening to songs, we memorize them because we're doing it while we're doing something else. Same thing applies here. Listen to yourself, give the talk over and over and over and over once you're memorized and really memorized, then do what I call an Italian run through. And this is from the world of theater, fast as possible, no emotion at all. You just want to give the talk as fast as possible. So your synapses are firing and you know that, you know the words, the moment you don't know the words, that's the section you're not memorized.

Speaker 1 (24:35):

Yes. And I remember doing this in the speaker salon, and I will say everyone, all you people listening that what Tricia just said, how to prepare, how to memorize. It works. Like, don't think your way is better. It's probably not. This is what works. Trust me. I did this when I had to give a keynote talk a couple of years ago. And the other thing that you cannot just glance over is the writing process. Because Trisha, remember when I first came out and gave my talk and Trisha is so wonderful because she'll say, Oh, you know, I really thought this was very strong, but Mike, you think about, and then she'll give her feedback and it's such a gentle way to give feedback. And you can, you can expand on that in a second. But I remember giving my talk and you were like, is this about you?

Speaker 1 (25:30):

And I said, well, yeah, it is. And you were like, why are you doing it in the third person? So I have this clever talk. It was, I mean, it was all written out. I was ready to go. I was prepared. And like Trisha said, you're gonna edit, edit, edit. You're going to feel uncomfortable with it. And then you're going to do it. And that's exactly what happened. And it was all the better for it. So the other thing I would say is get feed back from a coach from a trusted person, because when you're in it, it's hard to see out of it.

Speaker 2 (25:58):

And we are not comfortable being vulnerable right away. We often need permission. We often need to have a safe place to become vulnerable. And that's what I witnessed with you. Karen, as you walked up on stage, super confident sharing the story, it was very compelling story and zero vulnerability. And the moment you told us it was about you and that it was about your chronic pain. We all leaned in and could not take our eyes off of you. It was the most powerful transformation. One of the most powerful transformations I've seen. And I've seen a lot when you're talking about feedback and this is really, I'm great. I'm really grateful that you brought this up. Karen feedback is paramount. And you also need to know when you're asking for feedback and from you. Many of my speakers in the past have asked for feedback one or two weeks before their Ted talk and we're not specific.

Speaker 2 (26:58):

And all of a sudden they're getting feedback from random people. I think you should change the beginning. I don't really like what you're doing with the choreography and the blocking is not good. And all of a sudden they have absolutely no confidence. And that's because they weren't specific in asking for feedback three months before the event ask for feedback from somebody you trust a coach, whomever, because you have time to make those adjustments two weeks or one week before your event. Let's say two weeks. I'd like to know if there's anything about this specific talk that you love week before. You're a warm body. I don't want you to say anything afterwards, except thank you for giving this talk. Right? So get really specific when you're asking for feedback so that you don't derail yourself a week or two before, you're about to deliver a talk that you have memorized and no longer have time to make adjustments.

Speaker 2 (27:57):

Yeah. And that is great advice. And it reminds me of advice that jazz, who we both know, lovely, lovely, jazz set on this podcast. She said, you know, cause we were talking about asking for feedback from people and she's like, you wouldn't leave your apartment to go get a cup of coffee and ask every person you passed on the street. What kind of coffee you should get? Because you're going to get a different answer. And it's just crazy-making. It is crazy-making and nobody needs crazy-making two weeks before they're set to give a Ted talk. No, that's the visualization making needs to be happening. You need to be visualizing what it looks like to walk out onto that stage. You need to be visualizing what it looks and feels like to be delivering perfect mandating, powerful idea, worth spreading. You need to be visualizing what it's going to feel like when they applaud and when they rise to their feet and give you a standing ovation, you need to be visualizing what it means to walk into an out of that red circle.

Speaker 2 (29:01):

And this is part of the deep preparation work that I do with my TEDx speakers and with my community and clients is it is a big deal to walk out onto that stage and deliver your powerful message. You can change and save lives by speaking, whether it's in the red circle or not. So taking the role of speaker seriously and understanding the magnitude of your responsibility requires you to go above and beyond. It's not just about memorizing and talk and going and doing performance. Think about how powerful it is when that person is going to be watching your video. And they're going to think differently. They're going to potentially behave in their lives and that ripple effect can reach every other person in their life. So it is a very big responsibility when you are speaking from any stage. So give yourself permission, set yourself up for success by going through the process.

Speaker 2 (29:58):

And that's why I say nine months, because you really want to give yourself enough time to identify that idea, cultivate that talk, frat that beautiful, powerful talk, memorize it in a way that is so solid. You, if the chandelier falls on your head, you could absolutely continue and then give yourself the success set up by visualizing, by knowing what you're going to eat. And at what time you're going to eat it before you take that stage so that your body is not using energy to digest, but it's using energy to support you as a performer. This is about being an athlete and any and everything that you can do. You want to shoot that ball into the, into that hoop over and over again so that your muscle memory is ready to go. It is game on and Kyrene did this so beautifully. We worked like an athlete, works repetition over and over mindset. Self-Sabotage we did every possible trick and, and practice in order to have her walk out onto that stage and own it. She got a standing ovation.

Speaker 1 (31:06):

Yeah, she's amazing. It was an amazing talk. And again, we'll have that in the show notes here as well. Well, you know, I was going to ask you, would you like to sort of wrap things up, but you already did it. That was a perfect way. Now, before we before we end the podcast where can people find you? And if you don't mind, can you talk about your new book?

Speaker 2 (31:28):

Oh my goodness. I would love to talk about my new book. I'm a new author and it is so exciting. It's all the influential voice saying what you mean for lasting legacy. And it is on presale now@theinfluentialvoicebook.com. And you can find me at Tricia, brooke.com. I'm on Instagram, LinkedIn, and the influential voice is really a book about how to be a good human being while also teaching you to effectively communicate on stage and off. And I wrote it in June of 2020 instead of going to Mexico for 10 days with my husband, because we were all quarantining inside. I decided to use that time to write a book about how to teach people, to communicate with dignity, respect, curiosity, and love. And it is my hope that it will teach people that their voice matters and how to use their voice for good in the world.

Speaker 1 (32:25):

Amazing. And what a great use of time during quarantine. Geez. I feel like I just like rearranged my apartment. You wrote a whole book. That's amazing. Amazing. Yeah. And so we'll have links to that as well. Now, Trisha, before we leave I've asked you this question a couple of times already, but you're going to get it again. At what advice would you give to your younger self knowing where you are in your life,

Speaker 2 (32:51):

In your career? You can not imagine what is waiting for you. So keep taking those forward steps, excellent

Speaker 1 (32:59):

And advice. And Tricia, thanks so much. This was fabulous. I think everyone here will be inspired. They will start looking up those TEDx stages and, and again, get your book, get Chris Anderson's book, Ted talks. I think there are two great resources to sort of set you up for success in your speaking career, regardless of you get on a Ted stage or not. So thank you so much for coming on. Thank you, Karen and everyone. Thanks so much for listening. Have a great week and stay healthy, wealthy and smart.

 

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